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Why Do We Fall in Love with Certain People?

A man and a woman are standing opposite each other

 Why do we choose those individuals from all the possible choices we could have made? In this article, we will be taking a look at some possible answers to this question.

 There are many triggers that prompt someone to fall in love or at least start the process.


     Process of Falling in Love.

     Compatibility.

 Sometimes people misunderstand what compatibility refers to. The truth is that compatibility is how people relate to one another. If they relate well to one another they will be enjoying the time they spend together. It does not mean that they have to share every interest that their partner cares about.

 There is a strange idea that has promulgated that we have a soul-mate. That the soulmate will be compatible in every single way. It is possible that people reject potential partners because of this idea because they are not compatible in one small area.

 It is not necessary to be compatible in every single area of life.

     Love at First Sight?

 How long is it before you can say that you love somebody? Do you know in an instant or does it take a while? If somebody was to fall in love with someone at first sight, then it must involve appearance only. Something very superficial; in fact, it is necessary to spend some time with each other and see if they enjoy spending time together. Society calls this period of getting to know each other as dating.

 They Make Each Other Complete. These sounds very much like a cliche but, in fact, conceals a serious point. Personalities that have a negative effect on their partner are destructive. That cannot be making the other partner complete and will lead to unhappiness.

     Falling in Love Fast.

 If a couple fall in love fast, before they had time to get to another, then they are falling in love with an illusion. It has to be an illusion since the reality of the person is not yet known. Where does that illusion come from? Psychologists say we are projecting positive attributes onto the other person. Attributes that we ourselves have. These relationships are often very emotional and sexual. This can result in short term intense relationships. These end when the true nature of the partner comes to light.


 It is possible to fall in love with someone because of physical attraction. But, a love based on physical attributes alone will soon become hollow. There has to be more in the relationship.

     Falling in Love Slow.

 When a couple falls in love slow they have time to learn about the real person. By falling in love slow an individual identifies positive traits. There is also time to establish that it is possible to have consistent fun with the partner.

 A true love has to involve commitment and both partners have to be confident that the other will be there for them. There for them in hard times and when facing any difficulties. A person who would be there for them in sickness and health. Their relationship would be both romantic and based on friendship.

Loving couple cuddles

     Factors That Make People Fall in Love.

      Take Good Care of Yourself.

 The physical appearance of an individual has a great impact on the chances of a relationship. That first glance may decide if someone continues trying to get to know a person or not. If someone looks unappealing then why would some bother to take time to get to know them?


 So many people cross our paths every day. If you have taken no time to look after their appearance, why should anyone notice you?

     Make them notice (and remember) you.

 If you do something that makes your chosen partner notice you, then they may pause a moment to consider more. They may look past your physical appearance and think about you as a person. If they remember you then they may well start to study and look for more good points.

 If you have a passion about something it will come across as an attractive feature. People like someone who cares. If you come across as confident then this also will be a positive trait.

     Think About Why You Want to be in a Relationship.

 Think about your motivation. If you are hoping for a new relationship to replace a lost one, or to make an old partner jealous, then this is not fair. It is not fair on the new person you are trying to attract, who may well get hurt.

 If your reasons are more genuine than that is completely different and is a worthy ambition. Continue trying to make him or her love you.

 Think about your goals for this new relationship that you are seeking. If your goals are not long term then keep it simple. Do not concern yourself making the individual love you.


     Develop a Bond Between You.

 Get to know your target partner better. Ask them questions about when they were a child, their likes and dislikes, what their hopes and dreams are. Show an interest in what your potential partner likes. A good tactic is to ask your target to explain something about his interest (football for example).

If you find that he/she likes a certain type of music then research it, listen to it, and find songs you like.

 Psychology also, suggests that by asking the person questions it will make them feel good. By making them feel wise you are creating a bond. Another way is to ask opinions about clothing and opinions on fashions.

     Creating Trust.

 In order for a relationship to thrive there has to be trust between the partners. To get someone to love you, it is necessary to build this trust. Make sure any secrets that he or she shares with you are not repeated. Should you uncover anything that might be embarrassing then do not mention it. Do not tease him or her.

 Share your secrets with them and let them know exclusive information. Are things that nobody else knows? If something upsets you, do not hide it from them, be open about your feelings.

Happy young married couple laughing

     How do we Encourage the Right Person?

 Why do we fall in love with certain people is a two way question. Why do we fall in love with them and Why do people fall in love with us?

     Does Your Potential Partner respect You?

 Having a string of unsuccessful relationships will reduce your self-esteem. This will make you feel miserable and will cause stress. It will also reduce your attractiveness to other potential partners.

 To avoid failed relationships it is important to establish that they respect you. Once you have your eye on someone one of the first things you should assess is whether there is respect. You should continue to track the levels of respect throughout the relationship.

 If you are not respected then there is little point in worrying about other factors. If you are not respected you will feel used and frustrated.

 Screening for respect will reduce the number of wasted relationships that you endure.

     Respect Yourself.

 Avoid wasting your efforts on relationships that leave you unfulfilled. These relationships will only make you unhappy. Be confident enough to dispose of relationships that you maintain out of fear. Fear that you will be alone. Be positive and move forward with your life. A worthwhile partner will support you. They will respect you in front of other people, and they will not put you down. They also invest time in you. If you accept less than this you are devaluing yourself.

     Do You Respect Your Partner?

 Of course, all this talk of respect has to be two-way. You should show respect for your potential partner too.

     Be Visible.

 Getting out where you can meet people is going to improve your chances of a relationship. If this works then spend a great deal of them with the person until they are reliant on seeing you. Once you have done this take a temporary break and spend time away (short time). This way they will realize they miss you.

 Maintain eye contact for longer than you would in normal circumstances. Psychologists have proved that those in love spend far more time making eye contact. Longer eye contact with your target you will make his or her brain think about relationships.

     Lighting.

 You may have heard of “Bedroom Eyes” these are eyes that have larger pupils which is a “look of lust”. According to studies we react to larger pupils without being aware. Now it is not possible to control your pupils to simulate this look. But, by reducing the light your pupils will expand by themselves. With a clever arrangement of lighting, you can create this response in your partner.

 Looking at these processes that are part of question why do we fall in love with certain people? It is possible to understand why someone is acting in a certain way towards you and also how you can act to attract someone.

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