A good marriage relationship is something that most newly married couple are seeking. Sometimes those who have already been married for years will also wonder about this, as they reflect on issues in their marriage. In looking at this question of what is a good marriage relationship we will first talk about Consultation, a technique which has proven benefits in maintaining happy marriages, and then we will take a look at a list of factors that define a happy marriage.
Consultation.
One of the most important aspects of a happy marriage is consultation. Consultation in a marriage is a way of life, not a conversation. Consultation involves a deliberate decision to share and acknowledge each other’s opinions.
The process of consultation is that the couple will set a time to shut off all other distractions and focus on one particular issue. No mobile phones, TV, or any other distractions. Normally, a consultation involves resolving one single issue that is a cause for concern.
If there is tension between the couple it is wise to state a few positive affirmations first to remind the spouse how they are loved, and all the good things about them. Once this has been done, the couple can then focus on the issue they want to discuss.
Both sides should take turns in speaking. When the spouse is speaking, the one listening should be paying attention. It is important to separate the issue from the person and not to identify solutions as her solution or his solution. They are all solutions, nothing more.
Once solutions have been presented it is then a matter of forgetting whose solution it is and looking at its merits and its downsides, honestly.
What the couple is trying to escape from is the usual “I am right, and you are wrong” type of discussion. That is why you do not focus on whose solution you are discussing.
Consultation has been used by many couples as a technique for many years and has proved very effective.
Examples of Practices Found in Good Marriages.
An example of an attitude that points to what is a good marriage relationship is that you, as a couple, can motivate each other. You can encourage each other to enjoy the most full life that you can. In doing this, you work together in achieving what are your common goals. It is a partnership of equals.
You always see your relationship as the number one priority. Anything that might cause problems in that relationship is swiftly disposed of. The couple will not allow anything or anyone to interfere with the success of the relationship. They see the relationship as the core around which they build their lives.
The couple has an acceptance of the reality of who they both are. There is no desire or expectation for either partner to change. Both partners are content with the relationship and see no need for anyone to change for it to work. Acceptance brings peace of mind and a reduction in stress.
You both feel safe in expressing your personal opinion. You know that your spouse will listen and then take into consideration your feelings on any issues that arise.
Neither partner worries about expressing an opinion. They are fully confident that their partner will take the time to listen to their opinions and consider it when decisions have to be made.
When giving an opinion, the partner will have already taken into account the feelings of the partner. However, it will be an honest statement and not just something that is said to please the spouse.
Both husband and wife have an awareness that occasionally disagreements will occur. Both of them will be open to the opinions of the other and will try to look at the merits they may contain. The concept of consultation will be an everyday part of the couple’s life and by being able to separate opinion from the individual expressing it; they will maintain the ability to oppose an idea without opposing the person.
If you think what is a good marriage relationship, one essential answer would have to be that you feel both happy and secure with your husband/wife.
Unhappiness is a sign that there is something wrong in the relationship’s core. This happiness should not only be when you are with your spouse, but also continue when they are absent.
In a good marriage, both partners must be able to converse in an open and truthful way. There will be no need to think too hard about answers when asked a question so as not to offend your partner. If you are constantly having to modify answers, then this indicates that there is no honesty in the relationship.
Natural feelings about the spouse should be loving, giving and kind. If negative feelings are creeping in, then that is a matter of concern and the issues should be addressed.
Finally, if someone were to ask about the relationship, both partners should be able to honestly reply with answers that are generally positive. They should be expressing answers that show happiness, security, and contentment. If you are not, then some work is going to be needed.
Final Words.
When considering a good marriage relationship, there will be many factors involved. Each person if asked to describe a good marriage will probably have a different selection and place them in a different order of importance. Views are going to be very subjective in such a personal issue. One factor that will nearly always be present and at the top of the list is intimacy. This refers to physical intimacy.
After all, marriage is supposed to have a physical element. It also means an emotional intimacy where the couple feels a closeness that is exclusive to them. Barriers between them should have mostly crumbled and there is genuine care for each other. Once this is established, then maintaining that intimacy is what it is all about. All of the other tips and the discussion on the consultation are simply methods of forming and maintaining that union.
